yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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