TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
