I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I deserve this hangover.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
