Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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