I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
