Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
So vagazzling was a success
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
