You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
dude. I can hear the air.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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