U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Randomize
