bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
