I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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