I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
