I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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