hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I am one with the molecules
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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