I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
