We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
