I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
