you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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