It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
