we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize