There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
