i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize