totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
