I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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