Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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