Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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