Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
