Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
