Your mouth is God's brothel.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Randomize
