There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I could fuck to npr.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
