you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
