You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
