I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize