just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
