We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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