normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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