We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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