went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
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