? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
