im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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