i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
