my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
