Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
