Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
