Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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