Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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