Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
