im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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