I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
