I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Randomize