dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
