Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
